Wed 19 Sep 2012
The ULTIMATE Tetherd Cow Post
Posted by anaglyph under Gadgets, Hmmm..., Words
[14] Comments
I’m seeing a lot of floppy uses of the word ultimate lately, and the above promise from the makers of a massage chair in my local shopping mall is no exception. The Oxford dictionary tells me that, as an adjective, ultimate can either mean:
1. being or happening at the end of a process; final:
2. being the best or most extreme example of its kind:
Now, I don’t really think that the makers of FeelGood Massage Chairs ((I’d just like to point out that this name is strikingly close to the Tetherd Cow Ahead trademarked proprietary process of FeelyGood™. I’d better get Cow Legal onto this.)) mean to suggest that sitting in this chair might be the last thing you ever do, so we must infer that they are promising to give the sitter the best Shiatsu massage that money can buy. ((Strictly speaking, I guess they are offering the best Shiatsu massage that $2 can buy, which I am pretty sure is never going to get into the ultimate range.))
Somehow, this does not fit with my mental vision of the ultimate Japanese Shiatsu massage, which goes more like this:
Any other contentious uses of the word ultimate out there, Faithful Cowpokes?
well!!! Did you pay your $2 and try it?
No way. I pay attention to the primary Oxford meanings.
EEEK! When I saw the email announcing your “ultimate post” I catastrophised the whole business assuming you had decided to give the game away now that I’d finally subscribed.
Thankfully my alarm was unfounded but I’m obviously a definition 1 type of guy.
Perhaps one can divide all people along those two camps – a half full/half empty sort of division.
Oh, I wouldn’t do it to my Faithful Cowpokes that brutally. I’d give you a penultimate post, at least.
Huh. I was kinda thinking the same thing, actually. Apparently Acowlytes know their English.
True Acowlytes know that Rasputin will always be the Ultimate Tetherd Cow Post.
Ultimate in the second meaning. Otherwise, what the frak have I been doing these last years?
out of the mouths of babes…
I can’t get over the ‘Oi’ Try Me slogan.
Perhaps they thought that would appeal to the Australian market?
The King
Yeah, I know I always respond to someone saying ‘Oi, you – do this!’
It is now two weeks since your last article on Tetherd Cow. It bloody WAS the ultimate, wasn’t it?
You want us all to switch to your new drowsyhumming site. I’ve tried drowsy humming and frankly, it puts me to sleep. I know nothing about sound engineers – they’re all weird.
I need Cow. In big chunks. Red and raw.
PS Not dairy Cow, of course. I prefer a well-hung Aberdeen Angus.
Don’t despair Froggie – I have some good things coming for the Cow. It’s just been a busy few weeks here at Cow Central as Violet Towne is on holidays and it coincides with a rare instance of me having some downtime of my own, so we’re catching up on RL.
For the record, the Hummadruz site is in no way intended to replace the Cow – I found that there is no place on the web devoted to the skeptical musings of sound and it seemed like a missed opportunity that needed rectifying. Believe me, I have more than enough crap floating around in this head to cover both blogs :)