Sat 27 Jan 2007
Pick a Bale o’ Cotton
Posted by anaglyph under Cow Matters, Geek, Kooky
[14] Comments
Well faithful Acowlytes, wonder of wonders, The Cow is two years old today! Yes, some 730 days ago the first Cow post hit the blogwaves and there has never been a dull moment since. Well hardly any. OK, the occasional one, then.
Still, you have to admit, there have been some laughs along the way, and there’s even been the occasional chance to improve your Knowledge-Base of Useless Things*. You don’t get that from most of these johnny-come-lately bandwagon blogs, do you?
I’m not at all sure that you’ve been paying enough attention though, so today, an Easter Egg hunt through the archives. Namely, ten questions about Cow Lore. There will be a prize for anyone who gets all ten correct (really!) Supporting evidence will be taken into consideration. The judge’s (ie my) decision will be final and no correspondence will be entered into. Oh, maybe I’ll accept bribes if they’re to my liking…
Are you sitting comfortably. Then pencils up.
•Q1: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #1)
•Q2: What cologne does Daffy Duck endorse?
•Q3: Where on the main Cow pages does a portrait image of Sir Isaac Newton appear?
•Q4: True or False – perfume genius Luca Turin once visited The Cow in person?
•Q5: What does Allah’s Messenger deem a significant act of Satan (leaving aside sneezing, drowsing, menstruation, vomiting and nose-bleeding)?
•Q6: What world-famous politician’s wife made an appearance on The Cow, and what was she wearing?
•Q7: What kind of vacation does The Prowler favour?
•Q8: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #2)
•Q9: In which second language is the Reverend fluent?
•Q10: What organic alternative to WONDERCUM does The Reverend recommend? (Oh, OK, OK, I stuck that one in just to boost the search results again…)
•Q11: What other evidence do you have that The Reverend is bad at counting?
OK, that’ll do pig. Answers on my desk by the end of the lesson (email your answers to [reverendATtetherdcow.com] if you don’t want to give clues away… I’ll put all the answers up in comments)
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Yes, there really will be a prize…
Images of cow & candles for the montage supplied by FreeFoto.com
*Hereafter called the KBUT
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14 Responses to “ Pick a Bale o’ Cotton ”
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Well, I’ve had a lightning-quick set of answers from jedimacfan in which he has demonstrated a very superior grasp of Cow Lore. He can still be beaten however…
Email your answers to [reverendATtetherdcow.com] if you think you have arcane knowledge that you don’t want to reveal until the votes are in!
Q1: This is a trick question. I mean its relative. Shoud be “Where is th Cow most Level?” Im sayin th Cow is most level on its back. Thats how come you can put candles there.
Q2: Daffy endorses Silent Echo (fer Drakes).
Q3: A portrait dpicts a prsons head. Newtn got hit on th head wit a apple. That apple grew on a tree. I found a pitchr of a tree that come from a clippin o th tree that clobberd Newtons head. I found a seckon pitchr of it, nfact. I aint drawin a big distincktion btween a head n sompm that hits it.
Q4: Yep.
Q5: Im sayin glowin red eyes.
Q6: Hilllary Clinton was wearin a bikini. N jell-o.
Q7: Th Prowlr has no favorit haunts. A haunt is a haunt.
Q8: If th Cow is on its back, then its legs r up in th air; an ya cant put candles on the ends o th hoofs. So Im sayin th Cow is Level — I mean, most level — when its on its feet.
Q9: Ive heard th Revrend speak Bull pretty fluently.
Q10: Organic? I dunno. ORGANCUM?
Q11: Read th coments on this post, an youll have PLENNY o reasn fer questionin th Revs maffmatickle ability.
Sad, disturbing fact: the only answer I know without research is #6.
RaJ: And perhaps the most disappointing thing of all is that the picture of Hilary Clinton, which I have to concede I would probably accept, is not the person I actually had in mind. No, Obi Wan. There is another.
Sir, Sir, Joey is distracting me. And my pencil is broken.
Is the prize from Mysterious Corner?
Cissy Strutt: At least Joey has done his homework. Now, stop playing with that rubber band and get to work.
Pil: Well, who can really tell?
The loser has to sit in the mysterious corner and where the mysterious dunce cap.
Congrats on the two year anniversary. I’ll try to answer the next quiz when I get to know the blog by your third anniversary.
Sirdar gets a very special Swish of the Tail for being the only person with proper manners. Thank you for your kind thoughts Sirdar, and I apologize for all the riff-raff elbowing their way past for a grab at the Kewpie Doll.
I’ve had a few more submissions for the quiz, and so far jedimacfan is still ahead. I’m going to give it till tomorrow morning (which should be the end of Monday January 9th for the rest of the world) and then I’ll put up the entries and the answers…
Kewpie doll? I thought you said it was a Cowpie Doll!
I hate tests. I’m going down to the shops.
OK, the Quiz is now closed. Here are the answers submitted in the order I received them. Joey was quick off the mark as you can see above, with definite laugh points but not a lot of accuracy. jmf is ahead of the field with the most comprehensive grasp of Cow Lore. Cissy Strutt made a valiant effort, but despite significant toadying and deflecting managed only 4 correct answers. Which was a lot better than Pil who fell at the hurdle and didn’t manage to even finish. Universal Head gets the Wooden Spoon however, with not even a veiled attempt at answering anything. At least RaJ had the courage to admit to his shortcomings.
Answers, and the winner, on the main post later today.
jedimacfan :
•Q1: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #1)
In the header image random quotes
•Q2: What cologne does Daffy Duck endorse?
Brimstone, of course!
•Q3: Where on the main Cow pages does a portrait image of Sir Isaac
Newton appear?
I’ll be damned if I know I literally looked all the way back to the
first post of your blog.
•Q4: True or False – perfume genius Luca Turin once visited The Cow in person?
True. He commented on the post “Vibrant Scent” on October 2, 2006
•Q5: What does Allah’s Messenger deem a significant act of Satan
(leaving aside sneezing, drowsing, menstruation, vomiting and
nose-bleeding)?
Sky writing
•Q6: What world-famous politician’s wife made an appearance on The
Cow, and what was she wearing?
Hilary Clinton in a red bikini
•Q7: What kind of vacation does The Prowler favour?
Driving his Prowler in the desert with UFOs
•Q8: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #2)
“There Is No Cow Level” according to Blizzard re: Diablo, however
there is a Cow Level in Diablo II.
•Q9: In which second language is the Reverend fluent?
Vietnamese
•Q10: What organic alternative to WONDERCUM does The Reverend
recommend?
Green Apples
•Q11: What other evidence do you have that The Reverend is bad at counting?
“7 Things I Can Do” and you list 8.
Cissy Strutt:
•Q1: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #1)
There is no Cow level.
•Q2: What cologne does Daffy Duck endorse?
Jaded, pour canard
•Q3: Where on the main Cow pages does a portrait image of Sir Isaac Newton appear?
I can find the tree, but not the face.
•Q4: True or False – perfume genius Luca Turin once visited The Cow in person?
Both True and False. Scent permeates the very fabric of the Cow, and
certainly Luca Turin sent his remercies via the comments section. But can
one in any real sense “visit the Cow personally”? Is not the Cow indeed
UrCow, and so not so much visitable as communable-with?
•Q5: What does Allah’s Messenger deem a significant act of Satan (leaving aside sneezing, drowsing, menstruation, vomiting and nose-bleeding)?
Smart-Arsery ?
•Q6: What world-famous politician’s wife made an appearance on The Cow, and what was she wearing?
If it’s not Hilary Clinton in a bikini, then I’m stumped (sorta like
Condi in the picture)
•Q7: What kind of vacation does The Prowler favour?
Anywhere sepia-tinted in a convertible. With Flying Saucers. And cliffs.
•Q8: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #2)
Here. Here is the Cow Level.
•Q9: In which second language is the Reverend fluent?
The Language of Reason
•Q10: What organic alternative to WONDERCUM does The Reverend recommend?
Green apples
•Q11: What other evidence do you have that The Reverend is bad at counting?
… and you count, oh, you do count.
Pil:
•Q1: Where is the Cow Level? (Answer #1)
Diablo
•Q2: What cologne does Daffy Duck endorse?
?
•Q3: Where on the main Cow pages does a portrait image of Sir Isaac Newton appear?
God Creates the Platypus
•Q4: True or False – perfume genius Luca Turin once visited The Cow in person?
yes
•Q5: What does Allah’s Messenger deem a significant act of Satan (leaving aside sneezing, drowsing, menstruation, vomiting and nose-bleeding)?
?
•Q6: What world-famous politician’s wife made an appearance on The Cow, and what was she wearing?
?
•Q7: What kind of vacation does The Prowler favour?
driving a fast car
(Pil bailed at this point…)