Mon 27 Oct 2008
The Dumbest Kid in the Class
Posted by anaglyph under Australiana, Politics, Stupidity, Technology, Web Politics
[22] Comments
Australia is a country that is a long way from pretty much anywhere. For instance, if you had to walk to Australia from the US, it would take you nearly four months if you walked 24 hours per day and didn’t stop for lunch. And then you’d drown because most of the way it’s ocean.
Australia is also a country that lives under the illusion that it somehow has a credible presence on the world stage. I don’t exactly know how anyone here got that idea if they’ve traveled anywhere further than Bali, but that’s what our politicians keep telling us on the television.
Now for a very long time, Australia’s geographical disenchantment has been the source of hefty disadvantage when it comes to its interface with the rest of the globe. These difficulties affect political interaction, commerce, the arts and cultural discourse. This problem has come to be referred to as the Tyranny of Distance (from the title of a book and philosophies of a very famous Australian historian). For many decades, this looked like an insurmountable (or at the very least, hideously expensive) handicap for our isolated outpost.*
“If only,” people thought, “there was a way to communicate instantly with people in foreign lands! If only you could send them movies and music and pictures, collaborate on their projects, talk to them face to face and generally conduct business and social interactions as if you were just a couple of blocks away! If only they could pay you in their foreign money to do all those things via, oh, I dunno, some kind of secure money exchange that happened in real time! If only, instead of you having to sell your shiny gew-gaws to a sparse few customers in your neighbourhood, you could hawk them to a vast population of potential buyers from here to Timbuktu, all from the comfort of your own kangaroo populated home! Wouldn’t all that be just SUPER!??? Wouldn’t that almost instantly solve the difficulty of the Tyranny of Distance? Wouldn’t the democratically elected government of the Great Southern Land break open the bottles of locally-produced superior sparkling wines† and bend over backwards to see that such a magical solution was given every opportunity to work for the benefit of its citizens, its economy and its image as a forward-thinking and innovative political force of the 21st Century?”
Well, Acowlytes, that may very well have happened in some alternate reality where unicorns feast on sugar berries and rainbows grace every dew-frosted morning, but it’s not so, evidently, in the reality which we currently inhabit.
Some of you may have noticed that I’m sporting a new badge in the side bar over there to the right. This is because I’m really pissed-off that our government, notably their mouthpiece, the poorly informed Senator Stephen Conroy, is now trying to institute a level of censorship on the internet in Australia that is equalled in its draconian scope only by the restrictions on the personal freedoms imposed on the citizens of China and North Korea by their respective governments. And why? Solely because Senator Conroy (presumably goaded by a similarly unsophisticated lobby group) is apparently convinced that internet porn is going to flood into Australia and corrupt the minds of our youngsters, turning them into sex-obsessed Satan-worshipping crack-heads, and somehow usher in The End of Days. Or something.‡
I won’t explain the whole thing here – the proposal that has been advanced is so monumentally daft that a schoolkid can see the problems with it (and undoubtedly circumvent it faster than Senator Conroy can tie his shoelaces) – but if you are interested in further reading, the Electronic Frontiers Australia has a comprehensive and rational deconstruction of it on their ‘No Clean Feed’ site. (If you’re an Australian blogger, please go read it, and take some time to mount a protest in any of the manners suggested by EFA. This will affect you).
Briefly, the scheme that Conroy’s office has concocted, spearheaded by people who evidently think that the internet is some form of television, calls for censored content filtering to be imposed at ISP level on everything that comes into the country. It is entirely boggling to the mind that they believe this is even feasible, let alone that it will work. I can’t begin to imagine what kind of intellectual cripples are advising the government on the strategies they are suggesting should be implemented.** One thing is certain, any type of filtering on the scale called for by the so-called ‘Clean Feed’ proposal will bog down the net in Australia to a crawl and make standard commerce a chore beyond measure. Hear me Mr Conroy: these things are already becoming a problem, even before your dumb scheme kicks in.††
The image that leaps repeatedly to mind is that of a bunch of vigilantes from a medieval city deciding to burn all the bridges that lead into town in an attempt to keep out snakes.
For those of us who rely on the net as part of our business, particularly if we engage in significant international communication and data exchange on a regular basis, Senator Conroy’s idiotic concept is lunacy on an unparalleled scale. Our internet system is already over-priced and inadequate, a situation that our new Prime Minister, Kevin Rudd has pledged to rectify with extravagant overhauls of the current infrastructure. That was all looking like a promising move forward until Stephen Conroy’s torch-bearing villagers arrived on the scene.
And if Senator Conroy’s department being completely wrong isn’t bad enough, they don’t want to be told they’re wrong either. Mark Newton, a network engineer with an Australian ISP, Internode, who wrote an incisive and highly critical appraisal of the Clean Feed proposal (as is his right as an Australian citizen) has been the target of attempted bullying by Senator Conroy’s office in an effort to silence his dissent.
In his letter, Newton completely discredits Government assertions that trials have shown that a filtering scheme is viable. Confronted with Newton’s devastating demolition of their cunning plan, the Government’s response (in what can only be described as a typical last resort of desperate politics), was to promptly distance itself from the whole affair by laying the responsibility for the trials at the feet of the previous Government. So much for informed debate.
So, dear Potential Foreign Business Partner: if you’re thinking of taking your business to China or North Korea because they’re giving you a better deal, remember that, until global warming sets in, we still have better beaches. And Kangaroos. And the flights here are only going to get cheaper, right?
UPDATE: Even though opposition to the Clean Feed is growing (thank Spagmonster someone’s noticed…) Stephen Conroy continues to fail to understand the problem. In this morning’s Melbourne Age he is quoted as saying:
I will accept some debate around what should and should not be on the internet — I am not a wowser. I am not looking to blanket-ban some of the material that it is being claimed I want to blanket-ban, but some material online, such as child pornography, is illegal.
Senator Conroy, you really don’t get it, do you? We all agree that the internet allows some people to gain access to some material that is not desirable by our consensual moral standards. That’s not an argument that anyone has mounted. And there is a LOT of material online that is illegal. That’s not in dispute either. It is magnanimous of you to suggest that you will deign to ‘accept some debate’ about it, but that is entirely beside the point. What you think ‘should and should not be on the internet’ is as irrelevant as what you think should or should not be in people’s heads. You cannot do anything about that. And trying to make the internet into what you think it should be by using your silly filtering system is entirely impractical. It won’t work. It is a DUMB IDEA and it is not the way to tackle the problem.
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*Fortunately we had a lot of things we could dig out of the ground that other people were prepared to pay lots of money for us to send to them, so our fate as a permanent continent-sized penal colony was averted.
†Not Champagne, of course.
‡This certainly has to be along the lines of how these people think. You really have to wonder about the magnitude of their obsession. No-one’s going to argue that there is a level of undesirable material out there on the net, just like there is in the real world, but speaking as a person who spends a good portion of every day online, it’s not something that ever has an impact on my usual daily life. You can close your eyes and hide under the covers and pretend it’s not there Senator Conroy, but that don’t change a thing. Why not handle it productively and, oh, educate people better. Oops. Silly me. WAY too hard an option.
**One can only speculate that anyone with any expertise in such matters is cynically accepting Government money in the full knowledge that any system they may be attempting to set up will comprehensively fail. Either that or they’re idiots.
††And aside from that, do you have any idea how much this makes us look like utter inbred hillbillies to the rest of the world?
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22 Responses to “ The Dumbest Kid in the Class ”
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[…] spoken before about senator Stephen Conroy*, the politician who somehow† has ended up being […]
Hear, hear.
I have travelled quite a bit to China, recently. The internet restrictions slow down business significantly. And, frankly, don’t work.
Though access to blogs and other unmediated content is restricted in China, I still get hits from the mainland on my blog. That said, a passing foreigner in an international hotel in Beijing or Shanghai is prevented from exchanging material on a company intranet.
The Australian government authorities don’t even enforce many of the (mainly state) laws on X-rated DVDs and print material. Pointless when the ACT and NT don’t ban them.
More fundie silliness. I thought Oz was more mature.
headbang8: Hey there! Thanks for stopping by The Cow (I love the name of your blog btw).
It’s to be expected – blacklist filtering, whether implemented by IP or URL or Phase-Of-The-Moon voodoo is bound to fail. My brain reels when I try to comprehend the idea that the ‘experts’ advising the government have apparently never heard of VPNs or p2p or anonymizers. Isn’t it the first thing that anyone in the know is going to seek out, pedophiles and porn-mongers alike? The legal structure can’t even stop spam for chrissakes. The stupidity of the scheme is breathtaking.
In addition, it strikes me that it is entirely probable that people (such as myself) may even be prohibited from viewing their own websites if this idea goes ahead. Spagmonster knows I’ve had cause to blog about many topics which might offend Senator Conroy’s delicate sensibilities.
Yeah, me too. But that’s apparently only in Unicorn Land.
Thanks for your kind sentiments, Rev. I stumbled upon you some time ago from that slippery vixen, Nurse Myra.
Please feel free to leave some snappy backchat on DüE, too.
well this slippery vixen will have her blog axed quick smart if Mister Conroy has his way. I’m definitely not eligible for ‘clean feed’
No doubt this all started because of you.
Mark my words: You’re the first site to go once my operation gets up and running. Big Brother is Watching and I’m onto you.
wt?
Rev, that was brilliant reading. Blogs are the newspapers of tomorrow. If only we can access them…
But you gave use the Crocodile Hunter!
headbang8: Well, I’ll attempt some ‘snappy’ but that’s never guaranteed…
Nurse Myra: Yep, if Senator Conroy gets his way, the Gimcrack is toast.
Atlas: I really wish that The Cow had that much influence. But I bet you don’t.
Senator Conroy: Strong words for someone holidaying in Ohio…
Pil: The only problem with blogs is that you can’t wrap your fish & chips in them.
Malach: And you can keep him. Oh. That’s right, you did.
I’m sure that simple circuit diagrams and power efficiency charts relating to wind and solar power will also be censored.
No doubt all sorts of flow charts and factory blueprints for coal fired power will still be available of course…
And there was Chris Patten last night on lateline saying that Australia will be an important player and the international field now that Howard is gone. Shame Chris’s emails won’t even make it here.
http://www.abc.net.au/lateline/content/2008/s2402792.htm
Oh Rev, can we have some good news soon!
The King (sniff)
It is talk at the moment but will it get off the ground?
There are ways around the clean filter so why waste the time and money.
I have not followed as much as I probably should on this matter, but my understanding was the clean filter was not much more than the parental controls that are already available, is that right?
I have been dropping by here much more regularly of late. Always a good read!
Censoring has never worked in the past, no need to think it will fail again now! You don’t have enough faith in your government is all. Besides, is it really free speech if a a computer hasn’t arbitrarily decided before it gets to you whether or not it is free of hateful or obscene things?
And these sparkling wines, are they really moral enough for just anyone to be consuming? I offer to be the arbitrary provider level censor, of course it will be through complicated sampling techniques that not just anyone can understand.
King Willy: You don’t need to travel far to understand how most of the rest of the world views Australia. At best we are a curious far away land that has kangaroos, coal and Nicole Kidman. The Howard Government’s naive representation of us as ‘a vital part in America’s defense of a Free World’ is laughable. When it comes to Australia, George Bush doesn’t know his APEC from his OPEC. We still manage our economy on the sale of things we hack out of the ground, and to a lesser extent on things we grow on the land (which as you know is becoming less and less tenable). Incredibly, the one thing that we have in abundance is know-how, smarts and canniness (although I suspect even that is on the decline due to the general dumbing-down of the whole population). That’s a commodity that you can trade easily over distance, especially with the internet. Unfortunately not one single government that we’ve had since the implementation of the web has understood anything about how that might work. It’s entirely in spite of that that enterprising individuals have managed to create thriving businesses in the electronic realm.
The complete madness of it all is that, as oil prices skyrocket, and the economy tanks, shipping stuff around is going to become the biggest trade liability we have. But it costs peanuts to trade intellectual property, which is one of the fastest and most lucrative markets in the world. Can anyone else see how totally insane it is not to be making that a number one priority?
Rob:
No, that’s entirely incorrect. This proposal calls for a filtering system that will be compulsory for all ISPs to install. The web would be censored before it even gets to you. You will not know what they filter, nor have any say over what they filter. Initially, there was talk that you could ‘opt-out’ of the first, most severe tier of filtering (yes, that’s right – another bottle-neck for anyone who understands: two tiers of filtering…), but the opt-out option has now been called into question, presumably because someone has realised how utterly impossible that would be to control. In other words, you would never know what the government didn’t want you to see. Just like it is in China, Iran and North Korea.
And none of this is just talk. It’s become very serious now. It has already gone through one level of government ratification. Make no mistake – this government is clueless, and despite the fact that a child can see it’s an idiotic and completely unworkable concept, they’re still forging ahead. These matters are being decided by people who have no idea of what they’re doing. Please go read the EFA ‘No Clean Feed’ page. You’ll see how bad it is. We all need to protest about it, or it will just happen and no-one will be the wiser – until your internet bogs down into sludge and you can’t visit your favourite website because it happened to use the word ‘breast’ somewhere. (“Here’s the best schnitzel recipe ever! Take two chicken breasts…”)
Casey: You and Stephen Conroy would get on real peachy. I can just tell. I’ll lend you the sledgehammer.
China has a booming economy because everybody gets paid three bowls of rice a week and lives in two-meter-square apartments. And anybody who doesn’t like that deal gets run over with a tank.
Oh, so now you’re gonna bitch about filtered Internet and rice? Sheesh, there really is no pleasing you, is there?
anaglyph adds:
King Willy: You don’t need to travel far to understand how most of the rest of the world views Australia. At best we are a curious far away land that has kangaroos, coal and Nicole Kidman.
Of course, and I agree mainly with what you’ve said. I guess the point that Patten was making was that the world’s biggest per capita polluters (and of course we’re in the top 5) will need to ‘step over the line’ before the developing economies in terms of doing something about carbon emissions etc.
Obviously the states will be the major player as usual, but Canada and Australia will probably have some impact.
I guess maybe I drifted a bit off the topic generally, by bringing up Chris’s emails…
In the field of audio (with which you have a passing familiarity I believe) names like Avalon, Apogee, Fairlight, even AWA have acquired international standing. On all the audio dweeb websites it’s amazing how many aussies there are online, commenting, beta testing, or going os to make their fortunes. So we are canny as you say.
Yes I think this county is fucked (like 98%) of the human race, but I cling to my 2% (of which the Cow is part), and still manage a bit of hope.
Governments always seem to get it wrong, but if there’s an idiot on the throne – we put him there (or at least the other 98% did), so yes I’m concerned – but remember SCMS on Dats – there’s always hope.
Or rifles.
The King
The thing is that Australia was colonized at a time when plundering of abundant natural resources was the thing that determined wealth. That’s all well & good – everyone was doing it. But our ‘natural’ resources, at least in terms of farming and agriculture, are now unsustainable. Our coal, which is a massive export, is now declassé, which is why Mr Howard was so chipper about uranium. Our mining industry continues to get all kinds of government help. We’re still living with a barely-post-colonization mindset. It’s berserk.
Any level of rational scrutiny tells you that we should be selling our brainpower. Instead, all the brains (including the creative ones) go overseas. What the government should be doing is making an effort to keep all those brains and their concomitant industries here, where it can benefit from some of the generated wealth. Since the net offers a really good mechanism for doing that it is madness not to be pouring money and effort into making it work for us.
Instead, poorly educated people like Stephen Controy view it as some kind of Satanic Conduit for the Corruption of Our Virtue. They are idiots of the highest magnitude.
Yeah, my plane leaves in half an hour…
W
Actually if you get on how to get from the USA to Australia on google maps – Go on try it! The only problem is you have to stop by China on the way and land in Darwin and it doesn’t matter where you want to go in Australia… Me? I prefer to stop by New Zealand for some Fush and Chups
Hmmm. When I tried I got:
Mostly, I think, because the only options were ‘By Car’ or ‘Walking’. They should put ‘Swimming’ in there.
However, if I try to go from Los Angeles to Sydney ‘By Car’, it would appear that I have to drive to Canada, then to Hawaii (taking a leftish turn in the ocean somewhere to the north of Honolulu!), then head to Japan and make my way down through Indonesia. It would be kinda interesting, I guess, if a little moist.