Fri 10 Sep 2010
Look Into The Crystal Ball
Posted by anaglyph under Hmmm..., In The News, Skeptical Thinking, Technology, WooWoo
[15] Comments
You’re probably aware that Google has just launched their ‘predictive’ search engine Google Instant – a web version of the kind of ‘pre’ search which has already made its way into many desktop and phone apps. It’s actually pretty impressive. Not really the kind of news I care about airing here on The Cow, but the reason I bring it up is as a result of this quote, made by Google VP (the usually sensible) Marissa Mayer at the press launch in San Francisco: ((She also used the vacuous phrase ‘It’s a quantum leap forward…’))
We are actually predicting what query you are likely to do and giving you results for that. There is actually a psychic element to it.
No there is not, Marissa. There is actually no psychic element to it. It’s a technological element. PLEASE. The loonies don’t need any more encouragement.
And, of course, Microsoft has launched its competitor.
BSing.
Yawoo!
And for the more religiously inclined, Altar Vista and Ask Jesus.
Can it speak to the dead? Or toss around pyrotechnics?
Of course.
Well, I’m just glad I no longer have to type any queries into Google, and the search results I need will already be there when I open up the page.
Soon you won’t even have to open the page! They just send you an email with the results before you even think about searching.
Concentrating very hard…. I wonder if Ian McShane’s home phone number is about to pop into my inbox
Now, Nurse Myra. Woogle will only return results from the real world, not from the fantasy world.
They just set everything to porn!! Even if it wasn’t your first choice you realize that’s really what you wanted!
So that’s what happened to Fred Nile!
It was Google’s fault all along!!!
Ha ha!! ha ha ha ha ha !!! RESEARCH!!!! HA HA HA H…gonna puke!!
No. Really. Research. Lots and lots of research.
Does he need a smoke after he researches?
Actually I think that excuse is world wide. Someone in my lab said a local politician was caught with a lady of the night, in a government car, and said it was just research into the problem of prostitution.
Yeah – it could be a useful excuse in so many situations…
‘On my mum’s grave, your Honour, I was just researching bank robberies!’
But Officer, I was just researching what it’s like to go faster than the speed limit!’